As usual I asked this weekend my little-big kids what they would like to do. The answer I am dreaming of would be as follows: “Mum we will be happy to stay home, playing together or separately, or doing nothing at all and we will be as quiet as possible so you can stay in your bed and read a book or listen to the music or doing your spiritual stuff :-)”
However, the replies go in all sorts of directions such as: let´s go and meet someone – meaning let´s just pop into somebody´s house and wait what happens…to more reasonable ones like riding a bike, going to a park or a creative workshop. Sometimes I get confused messages how they want to go somewhere but they do not want to get dressed or they want to go somewhere we have already been but I do not know where the heck it is.
This Sunday Samuel said: “Mum, I´d love to go to that park near where we used to live and we used to go there with my friend Stani when it was so hot. Oh yes, sometimes it gets hot in Luxembourg. I knew immediately which park he meant. It is a huge private park with old trees and little paths, small lake with ducks and a shallow creek with a fountain and grass everywhere. We used to lay down there with friend of mine, each of us having 2 little toddlers and lots of stories and troubles to share. Children were running around, throwing little pebbles and wooden sticks into the water, admiring animals and asking about the old people in wheelchairs or elderly women and men walking slowly by. They always smiled at us with this smile which wishes you all the best. The smile which is happy for you. The nostalgic smile saying we were once there were you are now…and both parties felt this compassion and the sun and the breeze of change. While thinking about all this I felt the inner warmth and I wanted to know why. Why this park that has none of those things we suppose our kids love. No slides, no climbing walls, no sand, no merry-go-round. No adrenaline of indoor playgrounds. So I asked:
“Sammy why do you want to go there, what is it you like about that place?”
And he said: “It was so calm there. I used to go there with Stani – my friend and it was so good.” As simple as that.
Sometimes doing less with children is more. Their memories are bound to the very basic feelings of love, connection and stillness.